I have always attended church…was raised in a little conservative fellowship chapel. Made a commitment to follow Christ at 14 years of age and became part of a charismatic group. This choice was birthed out of years of emotional struggle and pain. A feeling of insecurity at home and at school left me feeling unhinged. The climax was when my Grandpa died. Living as a regular member of my culture held nothing for that volatile adolescent me… I wanted out and thank the Lord he found me before I completed my own solution.
Salvation was a choice of desperation… I felt I had no other choice at that point in life. Perhaps this is why I had no real idea what this choice really meant and for many years I mostly saw it throw selfish eyes… as if the relationship was for me and my benefit…Christ was a part of the puzzle and along for the ride…church was a place we where commanded to attended and might get a good high from…
I am now in a place where I question how much I have really counted the cost of following Jesus Christ. Have I really left it all to follow him and given up my self in true worship? Is he my life or just a piece? Do I invest in the body of Christ, The Church, or just attend a church?I am looking at breaking out of another cultural norm, feeling as if I need to go beyond the limits of comfort that the north American church has set for me… wanting more.
I found it strange to share my testimony at this time in my life, because in some ways I feel like I am at a point of greater transformation then when I said that initial prayer in tears. I used to go into great detail about the sad little me lead to Christ and the fire-y little me that followed the sinners prayer but now I am feeling like I must not allow myself to stay there. I am desiring more growth then I have thought necessary or possible for the last several years of my Christian walk.
I am truly thankful for the beautiful and the painful lessons that I have experienced. Wouldn’t trade in a single experience that has made me who I am today. Excited about what the future will hold. Desiring to grow in love always and I am seeking to live for Christ NOW.
LINKS to related posts RIGHT HERE and RIGHT HERE.
TTFN
It’s true that God can turn our painful experiences into ways for our spiritual growth if we allow Him to. Thanks for your testimony.
Awesome, awesome. I hear a strong beautiful woman emerging from her difficult youth. Hold fast to the hand of Jesus, and above all, study His Word.
You’re starting to look out and beyond your own “borders.” Each trial we face either beats us down, or makes us stronger in faith. You are choosing the latter. Amen!
Thank you for joining us for Marriage Monday today, Mac an Rothaich.
Blessings, e-Mom
P.S. I’m enjoying the fragrance of your fresh loaves of bread! And we have a similar tea kettle to yours sitting on our stove.
sometimes God puts us in another place so we will find Him again. The one being who can only fulfill our life. thanks for dropping by at my entry! 😀 Have fun!
I’m glad you wrote about your story! Maybe the key is that the most challenging / exciting / transforming / simple / intense / fearful / calm / trusting / learning moments of our lives are always right NOW!
Back then, when you made your choice for Christ was the most significant time of your life. And right now is the most significant time of your life (and your walk with God) as well. They can both be ‘the most’ 🙂
Oh, and keep enjoying your ipod!
Love you, Sis!
I can definitely relate to desiring continuing growth. I am often amazed at the way that God redeems our experiences in ways that glorify Him!
Thanks for stopping by my blog today. 🙂
I can really relate you when you shared about the transformation in your life now. When I shared, I really felt like I was leaving huge chunks out where the Lord not only saved me, but transformed me by his love.
Great story!
such a nice post.
Thank you for sharing your testimony. I appreciate your honesty, I think like a true birth God gives us growing pangs. Hard things, sometimes intense pain, but it grows us and the product is sweet and something we wouldn’t trade for the world. I look forward to reading more about your growth! Thank you for leaving a kind comment on my post. Have a blessed week!