Lit

Hours… I have been rocking for hours. The night is old, the house is still, with the exception of my whole body moving the rocker back and forth back and forth. All would be silent if I was not still humming a lullaby softly, almost mechanically, to my baby girl.

She is my first baby… I am a first time mommy… but the transition from woman to mother was instantaneous. The learning curve steep, the hours long… the stress unlike anything else I have faced… I am bone tired, my brain is on autopilot most of the time and I am often weepy BUT I am a fighter. I am devoted. I am with out a choice and yet I still choose to be her long suffering mommy.

There is a fire in my chest that was lit the moment we began our relationship and each subsequent sibling would add to that fire. It is a unquenchable passion for my children that is beyond the physical. It doesn’t require me to be loud and proud or to express enthusiasm physically… it is deep and constant and certain.

For the first time ever I listened to a message on passion in the Lord that didn’t involve PROVE IT techniques . It wasn’t driving us to be loud personalities or vibrant movers and shakers. The speaker compared passion in the Lord to that calm solid passion I just spoke of… a mother for her new baby… I was completely able to identify and it made me think long, feel deep down, about what kind of bonfire is in my heart for my Lord… how unquenchable and consistent, even more then that, constant is it…

Some of the most passionate Christian brothers and sisters that I have know in my life weren’t necessarily loud and proud, but they had a solid heart ablaze and that warmth flowed from them as they moved full of peace, grace and dedicated devotion to love… to love their Lord, love their brothers and sisters and even love their enemies. They have spoken much into my life with their passion for Jesus.

I am thankful for encouragement to fan the flame of passion in my life… to dig deep and find it still there, burning in my heart for Jesus.

TTFN