All posts in Bits Of My Personality

Weary

by admin on May 30, 2011 in Bits Of My Personality, Feeling It (Thankful), Life Keeps Changing with 1 Comment
Not the only woman to feel and become weary and wish to stop thinking and feeling for a bit but I am gonna just keep loving even though it hurts, for my own sake as well as for others. I am actually physically warn out though… as a result of the mental run around going on and the throbbing heart in my chest…

I look at my kids and my man and my dog and I remember joy and peace.

I resolve this week to look past the pain and do what I do because I like doing it!

I am going to clean up my house and do my laundry with blaring pumped up music, like I always do on Mondays.
I am going to go out and socialize with people who invest in my soul, as I often do on Tuesdays.
I am going to explore a park and the market with my littlest two, as I look forward to doing each Wednesday.
I am going to hang laundry in my pretty back yard and back bread in my cozy home, as I delight to do on Thursdays.I am going to find a coffee or tea date for Friday, as I tend to do; as if to wrap up my week with a treat.
I am going to try a little something new this week, as my adventurous side gets excited about, and start jogging with my dog again, as my practical side urges me to do… I AM GONNA DO!

Lol, just keep swimming, just keep swimming… wasn’t it a little blue cartoon fish who spoke those words of wisdom?

Bring on the week, the work and the fun can blur into one if I am moving with joints lubricated with love and joy in the Lord.

TTFN

And On A Lighter Note, ADVENTURE!

by admin on May 25, 2011 in Adventure and Me, Bits Of My Personality, People In My Heart with No comments

Moose Jaw Saskatchewan is the cutest little city ever! My best pal Mirelle and I had another girls escape this past weekend, in honor of mothers day, and went to this sweet towns famous mineral spa.
Oh it was fabulous to float around in the warm waters every day! The only other main focus we had for the weekend was to eat well, coffee often, and shop.

(The best part is swimming out to the deck and sitting in the warm water while it was raining outside!)

Shopping went well, we found something for each of our kids and got the one item we both focused on for ourselves; wallet for Mirelle and spring/summer purse for me. Don’t get me wrong, I adore the leather bag I have had since I was 12 but it is a hot heavy tot and not the nicest in the warm weather. I was hoping for a vintage-esk bag in a pretty color with the clasp that opens the top WIDE… you know, kinda the style you used to see the oldest lady use on the show ‘golden girls’… anyhow, with a modern flare.

(FOUND IT! The purse that is, in one of our favorite coffee shops of all places!)

Oh I can’t tell you my favorite part but I was very thankful we continued our crepe tradition/obsession and found a place that made them fresh.

(We found our crepe fix at a wonderful formal tea house! We returned there the next morning too as we couldn’t imagine going for breakfast anywhere else after our first experience there.)

(My morning rooibos tea never looked so formal!)

I was too excited ordering room service for the first time ever; pizza and gingerale in bed while watching a girl-y film. Dressing up to have a drink, one of the nights, in the hotels beautiful and sophisticated lounge was a classy affair and I could go on! This posts pictures will share much of my favorite moments and more!As always, with Mirelle and I, it was a weekend of relaxation but plenty of good talks. I am still amazed at our ability to just flow with one another. Although I might not have been the best buddy this time round, being a little raw with everything going on in my real world, I found her as patient and trust worthy as ever.

(Dining out at HOPKINS, a big beautiful Victorian home, was a great way to start our weekend. It was amazing to dine in what appeared to be the houses old ball room!)

I am home now and more then happy to be here but I love to think about the fun we had and always will enjoy these kinds of breaks from mommy reality. Here’s to more adventures!TTFN

Not Special

by admin on May 24, 2011 in Bits Of My Personality, Feeling It (Thankful) with No comments

Attention, when it comes to my health, makes me beyond uncomfortable. I had a hard time announcing my pregnancies in person and usually got my husband to do it…

Born with a birth defect I have spent much of my life trying to be included in the normal category… I soon realised that there is no normal and that we are all broken in some way. This made me decide invisible was a good choice. I worked hard, in my youth, at being unnoticeable and thanks to the in-obvious nature of my birth defect I was really successful at not being pointed out for this fact of my life.

I started to share about the birth defect with more people once I was older, because I really do see the miracle in it all. Based on the diagnosis my mom was given when I was born I am a walking talking miracle… It was painfully soon that I learned to hold back on the amount of information I gave. People got WEIRD in their reactions and responses. Some would all of a sudden treat me as fragile, others would make jokes… and although I don’t mind slip up comments about my birth defect I am not big on being mocked with jokes about it… and all so often I got very judgmental comments about being content in living with it.

Well… after years of trying to be indistinguishable amidst my circle of acquaintances I have recently been diagnosed with another reason for attention. While the specialists wondered how I felt about being saddled with a genetic disease I was only thinking about one thing… oh great, now I have to figure out how to painlessly tell everyone…. As far as I know, the other kids in the family from my generation have all had negative results for the gene.

All I can say is I am not special! We are all broken, we all die of something at some time and we all pass on and are passed the death gene by our parents.

The final thing I want to say is my God is good, all the time, Jesus is GOOD.

TTFN

A late ‘Marriage Monday’ on Moving

by admin on May 17, 2011 in Bits Of My Personality, Life Keeps Changing, Marriage Monday, My Romance, People In My Heart with 1 Comment

Beyond applicable, I have to say! My brother and his family are in the middle of moving a couple provinces away. From observing their experience, and remembering ours, I have points of view to draw on that include children in the mix. However, I think my tip is good for even the grandparents in a move or the childless couples out there.

The biggest thing I can advise is YOU LET THEM COME TO YOU! Everyone who you feel you need to really connect with before you leave needs to come your way. Let them know and then let it go. It is far to frantic a time for you, to disrupted and strange for the children; the remedy to ease that chaos is to really internalize your gaze to your little family and let everyone come to you. Don’t sweat the goodbyes as there are no real goodbyes now a days with Internet, phones and skype. Hold your little family together and find all the time you can to give your spouse and your children direct and patient attention at this time. Everyone else can either join in or butt out, and I mean butt out in the most friendly manner possible:)

Just my two cents.

First Monday of every month at Chrysalis

TTFN

Why Not Surrender

by admin on May 9, 2011 in Bits Of My Personality, Feeling It (Thankful) with No comments

I am not the first impression I give… nor am I my reputation, it will disappoint me.
I am not my style or physical appearance… nor am I my image, it will disappoint me.

I am not my past (memories), my future (dreams)… nor am I my story, my plan, it will disappoint me.
I am not intellect and memories… nor am I my mind, it will disappoint me.

I am not my feelings, my highs and lows… nor am I my emotions, they will disappoint me.
I am not my victories nor my failures… my self righteousness or my sins… they all will disappoint me.

I am not this body… it will disappoint me…

…it has failed me…

TTFN

Here (sixteen)

by admin on April 28, 2011 in Bits Of My Personality, Feeling It (Thankful) with 1 Comment

Writing is a soothing process for me. Thoughts are collected, lessons are established, memories are recorded, thus in the process all the more cherished, and feelings are unraveled, sorted so the monster is taken out of the emotions. Sometimes sitting here and trying to write a post that makes sense just helps me make sense of myself. A good writing session and looking over the completed first draft I often, at that point, find the answers I need and find which of the above things I am working out.

LATELY! I am so frazzled. The most ordinary of tasks seem like too much unless I can do them one at a time… if only I had a one track mind! If only a mothers life wasn’t multitask required!

I want so terribly to cram every thing into a compartment and that control freak in me then wants it to all STAY there neat and tidy… but there is no such thing as orderly, or neat and tidy in a mothers world… not for long anyhow…

Jittery! I feel like I can only settle it all down and just breath in my own home, when it is a quiet time and place and… well… my job is for ever requiring BUSYNESS and there is rarely a dull moment around here let alone a quiet and still place to be had.

As soon as my husband is around I want to hide… ‘HERE, take the kids!’… I want to hide among the bushes at the side of the house or in the back yard under the guise of hanging more laundry or fussing with the garden… always looking for ways to doddle and prolong reentering the world that is mine… and yet… it is mine, this is it… if I could just settle down… I would remember I am thankful and this is a blessing and this is what I signed on for and I am okay…

I am tired.

Yes he is my living water and often times I find Jesus in refreshing places in my life… but right now I have no literal quiet place to go to… so… SO THANK GOD he isn’t limited to me finding a time and place. Thank GOD he is right here, the atmosphere, I just have to breath him in… breath… no need to try to find him or to try to get away from my real world… just breath him in… THANK YOU JESUS for being HERE!

TTFN

I Was Reminded

by admin on April 27, 2011 in Better Check Out Links, Bits Of My Personality, Holiday Messages, People In My Heart with No comments

I assume not wanting to write something on easter, about that holiday, on the actual holiday, because it is to be expected and what is to be said is likely well know, would mean I lean more toward not being a special day type of person. It would also have a little to do with the fact that I missed out on the special holiday church services because of an ill little one in the clan…

A simple internet search and I found an easter Sunday message to listen to. A reminder in the form of a pod cast was given to me…

…a reminder that this story at this time, about Jesus… his death, his resurrection… it is also my story…I am made alive together with him. He might be the prototype of what I will become but I can live in that now too…

This is a grace story. Everything that every religion is trying to accomplish Jesus accomplished for us already and has offered it to us as a gift… This act of Christs ended the law, religion, and replaced fear and works with love and grace.

This is a fellowship story. Christ broke all the divisions and we, The Church, are supposed to fellowship in him in spite of all our outward differences; that includes our denominations and our doctrines CHURCH. Christ is our peace, there should be no divisions in us.

I was encouraged and reminded to grow… grow in my understanding of this story that is celebrated specifically at this time, about Jesus and his death and resurrection. I was encouraged that it is indeed my story but also all of my brothers and sisters story… may we all find our faith in one another, the members of the body, faith that we can learn how to truly love one another… as Christ does… he has sacrificed so much for us to be able to do just that.

TTFN

A.A.Milne and Me

by admin on April 26, 2011 in Bits Of My Personality, Book Flavor, Mama Heart Mushings, People In My Heart with 1 Comment

A.A.Milne, specifically his books of poetry for the very young, connects the women in this family of mine. My eldest daughter is reading through ‘While We Were Very Young’. She is focusing on a couple of her favorite poems to work on her recitation skills, in hopes that she can present some poems at a family gathering in the future. This is the first poetry book that really caught her interest and, largely, for the same reasons it was the first poetry book to catch my attention as a child.

The words roll off your tongue playfully and you can’t help but grin at the silliness. Oh how this father was so skilled at writing from the point of view of an imaginative child; this is the attraction to adults and children alike who cherish this author!

I felt great joy as I introduced this book to her. It brought me right back to the afternoon that I sat with Grandma and she introduced it to me. Christopher Robin’s prayer at the end of the book, ‘vespers’,was her favorite poem and both grandmother and I agreed with my mothers choice of favorite, ‘half way down’ was adorable and like jolly music when read aloud. As a girl I adored to sing talk the poem ‘hoppity‘ and now I find ‘teddy bear’ (the poem about Winny when he was still Edward) makes me stop and soak in childhood past. My daughter can’t get enough of the poem about the pet mouse and so this is the one she repeats with a cheerful heart.

It was Grandma who had also introduced it to her daughter (my mom) and although Grandma is gone I know a large part of the draw to this author; for my daughter, my mother and myself, is we have the pleasure in sharing this little bit of a book with Grandmothers memory.

TTFN

I Was Reminded

by admin on April 25, 2011 in Better Check Out Links, Bits Of My Personality, Holiday Messages, People In My Heart with No comments

I assume not wanting to write something on easter, about that holiday, on the actual holiday, because it is to be expected and what is to be said is likely well know, would mean I lean more toward not being a special day type of person. It would also have a little to do with the fact that I missed out on the special holiday church services because of an ill little one in the clan…

A simple internet search and I found an easter Sunday message to listen to. A reminder in the form of a pod cast was given to me…

…a reminder that this story at this time, about Jesus… his death, his resurrection… it is also my story…I am made alive together with him. He might be the prototype of what I will become but I can live in that now too…

This is a grace story. Everything that every religion is trying to accomplish Jesus accomplished for us already and has offered it to us as a gift… This act of Christs ended the law, religion, and replaced fear and works with love and grace.

This is a fellowship story. Christ broke all the divisions and we, The Church, are supposed to fellowship in him in spite of all our outward differences; that includes our denominations and our doctrines CHURCH. Christ is our peace, there should be no divisions in us.

I was encouraged and reminded to grow… grow in my understanding of this story that is celebrated specifically at this time, about Jesus and his death and resurrection. I was encouraged that it is indeed my story but also all of my brothers and sisters story… may we all find our faith in one another, the members of the body, faith that we can learn how to truly love one another… as Christ does… he has sacrificed so much for us to be able to do just that.

TTFN

Romanticizing Memories

by admin on April 21, 2011 in Bits Of My Personality, Life Keeps Changing, Mama Heart Mushings, People In My Heart with 1 Comment

No one had to tell me… I knew when I weaned my last baby that I would miss that stage of life. I had enjoyed pregnancy, birth, and nursing enough to know I would miss it, the nursing in particular… At first it was a hurt birthed out of fear of leaving the familiar behind. Now, with the advantages to this new stage in life obvious to me, the hurt has changed to a longing. Suppose it will always be a time of my life that has a sentimental and bitter sweet hurting to each memory from it. It would appear that I am getting close to being able to romanticize those years in my mind.

TTFN

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