All posts in People In My Heart

One Year Ago! SO THANKFUL! (nine)

(My Dad and his eldest daughters.)

My family grew by 8 in one day! My sisters found us and with them we gained their husbands and two nieces and two nephews! It all started with the call Kathleen made. Then there was a search on facebook and I spotted a photo of Kathleen and Amber and just knew. We all took our turns contacting one another. Yes we where all a bit stunned but there was also a tone of being thankful; it was time.

(There they are! MY FOUR SIBLINGS! Funny thing about this picture is I am pretty sure Jesse is the tallest of the five of us and he is sitting while the other three try to look like the tallest!)

(ALWAYS wanted sisters!)

Amber joined facebook and as I helped her walk through that we got to know one another more. I still will scroll and scroll back to our very early communications and sit and read in wonder. My heart will probably always swell with thankfulness when I think of their families being part of my life.

(Kathleen and Amber catch up on their big sister duties, poor Jesse…)
(Amber being a bossy big sister… well actually we where playing some ridiculously embarrassing game the first time we got together, to help lighten the mood I suppose! Too fun really!)
(Sibling love, at our first rock concert together! The first rock concert is very important when getting to know family!)

What a wonderful way to be reminded to be so thankful for all the members of your family, even the ones you have always known and had regular contact with. We always knew we where a crew of five kids but to go officially from the three to the five was a dream come true.

Related link RIGHT HERE:)

TTFN

My Clans Women!

(Our 4 generations photo when my eldest daughter was only a few weeks old.)

For many of us it is a shock when we finally realize and must admit we are like our mothers. For others we strive to be JUST like them because of our overly positive perception of the woman who raised us.

I just might be a little unique in my willingness to let my mother and my grandmother inspire who I am, mostly because I have been like this all my life, yes even through my teen years! I had to learn to just be myself when keeping up with my ‘perfect mom ideals’ became impossible and yet I am pleased to see areas where Mom and Grandma Smith have directly added to who I am. My children already are unlike me in so many ways, and like me in other ways. Perhaps my daughters will not be as excited to spend a whole Saturday at formal teas and yard sales with their mom and grandmother. Perhaps they will not be so thrilled to dress in vintage and second hand attire. But then again, perhaps they will like those things.

Stuff is stuff… however, their stuff, my moms and my grandmothers, reminds me of our similarities and I LOVE TO BE REMINDED OF THAT! My house is speckled with stuff that reminds me of them and my heart is as cluttered with memories of them.

(A photo of best friends! My grandmother and her aunt Ruth, taken the summer I got engaged when I stayed with them for a while. I can’t leave Aunt Ruth out of a conversation about my clans women! LINK HERE!)

There is a warm feeling in my heart when ever I wear my grandmothers clip on earrings. I enjoy her cheery yellow bread box and take pride in using her bread bowl to make my weekly batch. Her hands pounded down the dough in that bowl!

The red apron Mom made me is just like the yellow one she always put on and so I feel like a REAL mom when I wear it. I buy my pants from her favorite shop because she is right, they are so comfy and sharp looking! When she tells me it is okay, she made the same errors as a mom I realize there is hope! I don’t remember her screwing up, I have so much grace toward the women in my clan… I pray my girls will be the same.

When I look in the mirror and see my mother I am thankful. I look, hoping, to see my grandmother too… When I say something one of them always said I chuckle and hope that means I am tough and yet feminine like they where.

As much as I have put my own stamp on this families female collection I realize deep down I still like to try and be like my mom and my grandma…

P.S.
For more related links CLICK HERE and HERE and not to leave my mom out of the link thing, HERE🙂

TTFN

Childhood (eight)

I was trying to get a nap in after a very busy weekend when I opened one eye and spotted you fishing from the couch. Totally in another world, your world, you where very determined and dedicated. Apparently the blue paper fish was a real fighter for you struggled and complained ‘Come on, come on!’ as you reeled it in. The fish appeared to be crying as you took it off so you smiled at it put it back on the string and returned it to the water. This game went on and on and you where oblivious to my gaze so I had time to find the camera and snap away. Many of the pictures captured your concentrated pucker expression that I love and all caught a piece of this little moment of beautiful childs play.

I have the chance to watch you grow and to enjoy being part of the world of a child again thanks to you. Thank you Jesus that my kids have had many years to just be kids!

TTFN

Dad and Fire

Picture three older fellows, early 60s, standing in the village post office, side by side, hands connected in a firm manly shake. All three have cancer, two of the three are no strangers to it, and they are blood brothers as well. The fellow with the snowy beard and fiery spirit is encouraging them though he is the newest member of this club called ‘living with cancer’. They are on hospice, look it up, that means the doctors are done. These men are making a pact of hope and faith, that they will have this same meeting all together a year from then…

And they shall…

Many times have I heard my Dad talk about the concept of passing through the fire… he was often talking about the day of judgment but we all know we pass through fires in this life too… pain, struggle…

My Dad’s cancer has gone into remission. After the operation there was talk of another lump but when he came down for his latest check up it was gone… GONE… I keep my write ups about my Dad short… my Dad and his cancer even shorter… there is only so much one can say… PRAISE JESUS is in order.

I wish the blessings of a long life of walking through those fires with victory, in Jesus, for my Dad.

Dad quotes:

“The Lord has been able to give me grace toward a lot of people who don’t know how to deal graciously with me having cancer. Especially those from the church.”

“It is only a miracle because it doesn’t happen on command or very often. My cancer is in remission and I am hopeful to get the three score and ten years the Lord spoke of in his word. Anything after that, even one day, cancer or not, is bonus. Now if you will excuse me I gotta go fishing.”

TTFN

Dad and Fire

Many times have I heard my Dad talk about the concept of passing through the fire… he was often talking about the day of judgment but we all know we pass through fires in this life too… pain, struggle…

My Dad’s cancer has gone into remission. After the operation there was talk of another lump but when he came down for his latest check up it was gone… GONE… I keep my write ups about my Dad short… my Dad and his cancer even shorter… there is only so much one can say… PRAISE JESUS is in order.

I wish the blessings of a long life of walking through those fires with victory, in Jesus, for my Dad.

TTFN

Growth in Childhood Anxiety (terrible truth)

(The adorable frost mushroom that my kids found on my kitchen window, they check to see that it hasn’t melted away every day.)

Research into children and their modern stresses is going on as we speak and has been for a while. A paper is being written, and is currently under review, about some of the findings and what they may mean.

The author of this paper was sharing her thoughts today on the radio and I was amazed at the timeliness, in my life personally. I needed a good self examining of my parenting of late (always a good practice I believe). Am I giving in to the very non-beneficial social norms of focusing overly on pumping my kids up with the YOUR SPECIAL thing and disregarding the importance of teaching empathy? Am I pushing them overly hard to succeed at stuff like school or sports so they can GO FAR and I can feel good about it? Do I let them PLAY lots? Just play! Like kids!

Child anxiety is BIG, much bigger then it used to be and unlike other times in history it isn’t going down of late. In young adults it is actually growing all the time. They asked children what they are anxious about and not once did they mention finances, or enough money to take care of them (something I think a lot of adults worry about). The kids mentioned the unity of their family and the physical safety of their family. The researcher believes this is related to the fact that mental illness in kids and divorce rate are growing at the same rate. From personal experience I can see this relation since divorce really seems to be a lot of kids greatest fear.

Another large contributor they discussed was greatly related to EDUCATION… ‘What,’ you say? Education is a good thing… and it is but too much of a good things and… you are throwing up, to put it nicely. They discussed the overzealous ‘my kids is a genius’ trend among parents. Apparently most of the extra push to put these poor kids over the top isn’t working. Instead it is creating a less empathetic generation who is stressed out from a very very young age. Apparently it is called ‘shadow education’, when kids are put in extra stuff and put through extra stuff to increase their academic standing, when they are already successful (not talking here about children who need it because of learning disabilities and such). In the country with the highest usage of this parenting style (Korea) there is no signs that it helps.

When they mentioned how education is now considered THE only real way to really prepare your kids for SUCCESS my heart went in my throat… Sorry, for me that is where Jesus comes in… yup, love… that simple… They never clearly said it but it seems clear, once again, that kids NEED love to be successful in life.

Excuse me while I go hug my kids and make sure they know I love them… then I am gonna tell them to be nice to other kids (wink).

TTFN

Her… Thankful (number four)

(My eldest daughter and I singing a carol we learned together, our x-mas gift to my husbands extended family.)

9 years ago today she was her Daddy’s and my little miracle.
We owe the transition to parenthood to her entirely.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BEAUTIFUL!
Happy birthday ‘Eldest Damsel’!

A strong personality from early one has insured this Mommy and Daddy had to really work at being good parents. This personality has proven to be a gem and year after year Dad and I see more of that gem of a woman growing up before our eyes.

I am absolutely thankful for my Eldest Damsel!

As we worked on our Christmas gift performance of the carol ‘Little Donkey’ I was moved by how much I cherish the relationship we are working on, her and I… we are working on it, both putting the required effort in and both reaping rewards in it as we continue. I thank Jesus for my relationship with my Eldest Damsel and with big hopes for the future I trust our relationship in the hands of my Saviour… as I have trusted this daughter of mine in his hands since she began to grow in my belly…

TTFN

Her… Thankful (number four)

(My eldest daughter and I singing a carol we learned together, our x-mas gift to my husbands extended family.)

9 years ago today she was her Daddy’s and my little miracle.
We owe the transition to parenthood to her entirely.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BEAUTIFUL!
Happy birthday ‘Eldest Damsel’!

A strong personality from early one has insured this Mommy and Daddy had to really work at being good parents. This personality has proven to be a gem and year after year Dad and I see more of that gem of a woman growing up before our eyes.

I am absolutely thankful for my Eldest Damsel!

As we worked on our Christmas gift performance of the carol ‘Little Donkey’ I was moved by how much I cherish the relationship we are working on, her and I… we are working on it, both putting the required effort in and both reaping rewards in it as we continue. I thank Jesus for my relationship with my Eldest Damsel and with big hopes for the future I trust our relationship in the hands of my Saviour… as I have trusted this daughter of mine in his hands since she began to grow in my belly…

TTFN

Sentimental At X-mas (who would have thought it?)

(Taken Christmas day, a very warm WHITE Christmas!
I am wearing my mothers red dress coat, bought for her by
her father in law years ago.)

Who has flip flop feelings at Christmas? I sure do! Most of the memories I am making are down right lovely (the up side of the flip floppy heart) and yet there are always memories to reminisce and sigh about, others people to think about who are struggling or don’t have it so good.

There are also choices to be made and although I chose to stay here this Christmas I was also tugged when asked by a loved one from my husbands side if my folks where coming in for the holiday. With loved ones going there way and other issues in life they where not, nor was this unusual or normally an issue for me. The issue was the choice I had to make. If you let the hype get to you, about how Christmas is supposed to be, you will also miss the real deal… what it is actually about and so I swallowed that flip flop when it came and had a good look around me.I was surrounded by precious loved ones. I was more then blessed by generous people who care. Friends and family from my side did in fact find their way into our reality this holiday(as well as all the in-laws who are so good to me and so willing to be part of my world) and so I am not going with out. I am just another woman who has a heart that can easily flip flop on the most lovely of days.

The skype with my one older sister and her daughter was joyful, the phone call to my oldest sister was rewardingly warm, the weekend visit before Christmas with my younger brothers family was fun and important, the list goes on and on and includes a few surprise visits and gifts from dear friends and neighbors…Ideally we would all like to go home for Christmas, have ALL the family together at once but really if it has to be that way this time of year and we don’t worry about it for the rest of the year that is the great lose. May I make time for my family and friends all year round and may it be so sentimental for me despite the month or season.

I am so thankful for the sentimental stuff of life that makes us think about how we really value loved ones…I am thankful for any time, whether in person, on the phone or skype, with my family and friends where we get beyond chit chat and really put it out there that we care for one another! Praise the Lord for a whole nother year to love and be loved by PEOPLE.TTFN

Feeling the Thankful (one)

I shall start with what hit me hard yesterday because it made me feel so much.

I am thankful for the very cold and very wet hug my Dad gave me last night before they left for home. They where here on a short road trip for one of mom’s appointments. It was raining/snowing out.. So, when he packed and started the car he got drenched but that didn’t stop him from giving a squealing me a bear hug good bye. He knew exactly what he was up to and the hug was accompanied by his always hearty belly laugh. At first I could barely breath it was so cold and wet in his arms but then I laughed with him and said ‘Dad your crazy.’ And then he was gone and I was crying. Thank God for my Dad and his hugs. Nuff said.TTFN