All posts in Feeling It (Thankful)

A VISION, of two roads

by admin on May 3, 2011 in Feeling It (Thankful), People In My Heart with No comments

The following is based on Christs teaching of the straight and narrow way and gate as well as it’s counterpart The Broad and varied way.. I companion this teaching with another that is stated thus wise..” There is a way that seems right unto a man but the end thereof is death.”

An open eyed vision I saw on April 23/ 2011.. I saw this as a series of scenes, which I immediately understood and was left with a certain capacity to remember what I had seen. I felt, somehow that I was to write it in pros or poetry and not to obsess about it but to begin writing with expectation that it would then begin to come together. Which I did and this is what I wrote:

A Vision of Two Great Roads

The breadth of one road was amazing to see….

One could walk it in many ways and so SEEM to be free.

It attracted very many because of it’s room

And it’s dark colored brightness without any EVIDENT gloom.

But as one travelled upon and day fell unto day

The travellers thereon could see it was crumbling away…

Then further along great potholes appeared through which many did fall..

So that everyone feared.. that soon it would happen and they would be next…

Their hearts failing for fear, being so sorely vexed.

There arose a great fighting , as they were carried along,

The weak were hurled to their deaths one by one by the strong…….

Choking smoke and the stench of burnt flesh was so strong

That many stopped walking but were swept, by the road, relentlessly along.

Smoke of torment rose up thick from the pit

And at the end of the road ALL were dropped into it .

THEN Suddenly I saw a light that was brighter than day

And a voice was heard saying.” See a more excellent Way…

Narrow and straight, hard to find though it was,

One could easily find through “The Lamb of Gods Love”.

There was no room at all, to the left or the right..

But we walked upon it, as though guided and not using our sight.

We all walked close together, for there is so little room,

Encouraging each other as our Lord lit the gloom.

Helping each other to stay in THE WAY..

Singing Gods Praises and loving each other each day.

Our Master Himself, POWERED us to hurry along..

So that we focused on JESUS and His Spirit so strong

Then all at once WE ALL HEARD IT.. so loud and so fervent

“WELCOME HOME !! ENTER IN!!! TO MY JOY. BLESSED SERVANT

Contribution from Allan Munro (My Dad) Wednesday, April 27, 2011 at 3:22pm

TTFN

Faith in Marriage (Marriage Monday)

by admin on May 2, 2011 in Feeling It (Thankful), Marriage Monday, My Romance with 2 Comments

Our shared faith in Jesus Christ was one of the first connections we found. We both came from very different spiritual back grounds. If I am honest, at first I thought I had the advantage and had so much to teach Garnet but over the years we have both realized there are no advantages in the family of Christ. There are different experiences and different stages but there is NO spiritual hierarchy in this family. Thus, Garnet and I have learned so much from one another because we both came to respect one anothers spiritual walk.

We talk, oh so very often, about where we are at and what we are learning, although most of our study time and prayer time is done individually. We are so good at challenging one another and encouraging one another in our faith. There are many benefits to husbands and wives being really open to one another about their transforming process in Christ. We both reflect different parts of one God and so we have a stronger faith together.

What do I put my faith in? Oh many things everyday but most of all my faith is in Christ and that trickles down and affects all aspects of my life. With his firm foundation I find endless hope for the best in my marriage, in my family and in the Body of Christ that we are all members of.

First Monday of every month at Chrysalis

TTFN

Here (sixteen)

by admin on April 28, 2011 in Bits Of My Personality, Feeling It (Thankful) with 1 Comment

Writing is a soothing process for me. Thoughts are collected, lessons are established, memories are recorded, thus in the process all the more cherished, and feelings are unraveled, sorted so the monster is taken out of the emotions. Sometimes sitting here and trying to write a post that makes sense just helps me make sense of myself. A good writing session and looking over the completed first draft I often, at that point, find the answers I need and find which of the above things I am working out.

LATELY! I am so frazzled. The most ordinary of tasks seem like too much unless I can do them one at a time… if only I had a one track mind! If only a mothers life wasn’t multitask required!

I want so terribly to cram every thing into a compartment and that control freak in me then wants it to all STAY there neat and tidy… but there is no such thing as orderly, or neat and tidy in a mothers world… not for long anyhow…

Jittery! I feel like I can only settle it all down and just breath in my own home, when it is a quiet time and place and… well… my job is for ever requiring BUSYNESS and there is rarely a dull moment around here let alone a quiet and still place to be had.

As soon as my husband is around I want to hide… ‘HERE, take the kids!’… I want to hide among the bushes at the side of the house or in the back yard under the guise of hanging more laundry or fussing with the garden… always looking for ways to doddle and prolong reentering the world that is mine… and yet… it is mine, this is it… if I could just settle down… I would remember I am thankful and this is a blessing and this is what I signed on for and I am okay…

I am tired.

Yes he is my living water and often times I find Jesus in refreshing places in my life… but right now I have no literal quiet place to go to… so… SO THANK GOD he isn’t limited to me finding a time and place. Thank GOD he is right here, the atmosphere, I just have to breath him in… breath… no need to try to find him or to try to get away from my real world… just breath him in… THANK YOU JESUS for being HERE!

TTFN

Mental Fog

by admin on April 18, 2011 in Bits Of My Personality, Feeling It (Thankful), Four Little Eggs In My Nest, The Pet with 1 Comment

Sunday night and I finally get to sit and write, but I am so warn out from a healthy busy weekend that my mind is running on empty. The other night my husband teased me that I was thinking about nothing and I informed him ‘that is only possible for men’… but perhaps I was wrong… Being mom 24/7 can wear me down to the point of fogginess up there.

I am starting to think a bit of fog is a good thing. Although I am getting much better at slowing my life down when it gets to be too much for me, I am not so great at doing the same in my mind. I love to learn, I love to read, I love music, I can keep my mind just hopping with information and I like it that way… but now and then a little fog makes me slow it down… one doesn’t digest it all as well if they don’t pause for a bit. Was it my mom who told me to eat slower? Sounds like her… ‘helps with the digestion’ sounds like the right follow up to that comment and so I relate this to my hungry mind and the idea of making good use of all I am learning. I need to digest the info, for info alone is pointless… application is all too ignored in the church culture of today.

The weekend was a weekend for the kids. So much time to just bless them and it was grand! This is why I am tired! Kids have an insatiable appetite for fun and adventure and to truly give them what they need; time, a listening attentive ear, and loads of exercise, old adults can be warn to the beyond tired point. Endless chatter, racing around and joyful noise followed me everywhere this weekend, in the form of four beautiful children and their dog.

On Saturday it all slowed down graciously for two hours, while the younger ones napped. The older two showed their mama some love by playing Lego quietly for the nap slot of the day and I sat on my chaise thinking about how much I love silence… well thinking right up until till I slipped into a delightful nap. Quiet is delicious and I wonder at the fact that not so long ago I was unable to be comfortable in it. As much as I love the dins of music, messages and more I crave quiet.

Though it is not yet a year old, I fear my favorite spot, the chaise by the window, will soon develop a permanent bum print. I flee there almost daily with anticipation… a mothers fatigue graces my mind with enough patience to be quiet… I sit…. I stair, up at the trees in my front yard and the blue sky above that, … and I eat up the silence.

TTFN

Part of My Job Is Knowing

by admin on April 11, 2011 in Bits Of My Personality, Do I Call It Parenting Advice?, Feeling It (Thankful), Mama Heart Mushings, People In My Heart with 3 Comments

“Quite well, thank you, how are you today?”
I always answer,
I always tell them,
If they ask me
Politely…
BUT SOMETIMES

I wish

That they wouldn’t”
from a poem by A.A. Milnes called ‘Politeness’

Part of my job, as mommy, is knowing when it is all getting to be too much, and that you are only falling apart because you are in need… in need of time alone, in need of a hug, a drink, some food, or in need of things going your way just once in a while.

When I rush you in spite of knowing that ‘you need’ I rush you because I am rushed and, by golly, I am always disappointed when this happens… disappointed that I am rushing, that you are being rushed… when it hits me that you just wish the whole world and all its ‘to dos’ and ‘must dos’ would go away, I too wish it would all go away…

I wish that we would be left alone to just console one another…
rubbing one anothers backs and talking gibberish,
left alone to squish bugs on the front step,
oblivious to time while we share a snack.

A reminder to myself to put the daily chores on hold when my actual purpose needs me. My children are my purpose… my husband is my purpose. My house will wait and full fill its role whether it is dirty or clean. Christ is honored when I am able to choose the better way… relationship always trumps tasks.

TTFN

Knead A Little Love

by admin on April 8, 2011 in Bits Of My Personality, Feeling It (Thankful) with 1 Comment
I am up later then I want to be tonight. Waiting for the weekly bread batch to finally fill up their pans so I can bake them, cool them, wrap them and then go to bed… Staring at them and wishing them to ‘rise already’ wasn’t helping… soooo

He just will not leave me alone… you know, just when you think ‘phew that was a doozy of a lesson’ and you sigh and sit back and BLAM! More to come, tears, joys, growth! It is a strenuous ride that I have chosen to be on with Jesus.

Kneading bread is important to end up with a good batch of loaves. It is a process of pushing and pulling at the dough to get all the air out.The Bible speaks of knowledge as something that can puff up or fill with air. Love is said to build up… one solid and the other… easily burst.

We need to learn in order to love but if we spend all our time learning and knowing with out getting to the point, which is the loving, we will just be full of air.

Lately I feel a good kneading going on in my heart. Love is pushing out the old things I have learned that only puffed up and I am learning new things that establish love in my person all the more… love for others… Who really thinks it wise to wait till your death bed to realize LIFE IS RELATIONSHIPS? I personally don’t want to waste my time and then sweat it when I look back. I want to be able to count many a relationship that I worked on, put into… loved into.

Looking and finding people NOT LIKE ME.

Going beyond my comfort zones with Christ as my guide.

Well good night, I think I shall nap with the timer by my head… to remind me to get up and finish the bread… this should teach me to always start my dough earlier in the day… you think I would learn… you would think…

TTFN

Rubber Boots (fifteen)

by admin on April 5, 2011 in Feeling It (Thankful), Four Little Eggs In My Nest with 2 Comments

There is a colorful row of rubber boots in my porch. I love, dearly, the feet that fill each and every pair. Just this week those boot took us all exploring. No puddle was safe that afternoon! Four happy children trucked up and down the block with an equally happy mommy. Drains where cleared of the leaves plugging them, puddles where worked into a tizzy by dancing feet, snow was mushed and crushed to make way for happy rivers and it was all grand, wet fun.

Spring and all its muckiness can be more then tolerable when rubber boots are readily available. One can get out into the weather with out worrying about soakers. Once out the pleasantly cool air and increasingly warm sun are so contagious!

I am thankful for joy filled activity, outdoors, year round! And SO thankful for practical outdoor foot wear! Sandals in summer, rubber boots in spring and fall, and good warm boots in winter; practical is worth being thankful for! Believe me, if you don’t have the practical you will realise the blessing it is painfully quick. Thank you Jesus for time to puddle with my kids, to be outside and for the foot wear we are blessed to have!
Have you noticed that rubber boots are in fashion? Crazy… well perhaps not, I remember when ducky boots where in fashion not so long ago and they are just short rubber boots… or rubber boot cut offs… anyhow…

TTFN

Spring, New Little Potted Plant and Growing Now (fourteen)

by admin on March 28, 2011 in Feeling It (Thankful), Life Keeps Changing with No comments
(A precious little plant sits near my front window… potted by my eldest daughter… it is a sweet reminder of life and growth.)

Going to a gardening show with my eldest child’s class reminded me it was time to wait and watch for spring. Time has been flying this year and I actually missed the brooding months of winter because I was simply to busy for it, BUT I do adore spring and so I am excited to feel its approach. Winter appears to still have a steal grip on the land when you look at all our ice and snow but my morning jog is graced with the presence of an earlier sun and the kids complain of too much light at bed time… all this is a grand sign of springs inevitability!

Winters end makes me reminisce and examine my own history. I am a mother of four. I am a wife, have been for almost eleven years now. I am a Christian, and have been for about 15 years. Have I grown up? Perhaps…

I am certain that I have grown and the learning curve of life has often spiked straight up. A heart willing and fearless about growing helps the climb go smoother and quicker. Different climbs have been far more straining on my body and others on my mind and even others still, on my heart. It is good to look back long enough to see where we began and how far we have come… and I used to think it was essential to then look ahead with big dreams, to grind my teeth with determination and walk with stubbornness… but lately I am better at enjoying the climb, where I am at, and that is largely because this growth is happening without me…

Spring is change, growth, rebirth and that is in the now of our lives. It is beautiful, delicate and oh so short. The return of spring reminds me to live today. I have and am surrendering dreams and finding better… I have and am embracing my shortcomings and finding strengths in their place… I am learning all the time what love is, what wisdom is and I am blessed. I feel freedom in my heart more then ever before and I believe that is a true sign of growth!

I thank God for spring, and more then that I am thankful for each and every day for growth, for NOW in Christ.

TTFN

Forgiveness (thirteen)

by admin on March 19, 2011 in Bits Of My Personality, Do I Call It Parenting Advice?, Feeling It (Thankful) with 1 Comment
(Riddick has nipped, my little fellow has punched… and yet they keep working on their relationship.)

When my children engage in fighting and hurt one another I ask them to forgive one another. They always want to know why… what is in it for them? I remind them that the other does love them and it is worth forgiving to keep that love whole. I remind them that the other person is more then the wrong they committed and worth the pain it takes to forgive them. I remind them they don’t have to prove how wronged they where by holding on to it, length of time brooding doesn’t prove how bad it was. A long held wrong only continues to hurt the one who holds on to it, the most and the more. “Is this the hill you want this relationship to die on?” and they always look at me… “Another words, is this issue more important then your brother/sister?” The answer, thank the Lord, has to date always been no it isn’t as important as him/her.

I, me thinks like most other adults, struggle with this when faced with times to forgive… all the more when loved ones are the culprit, when loved ones are the victim or when fear is involved in the hurt… I pray by teaching my kids these ideas about forgiveness young they will not struggle as we adults often do… I pray by teaching this I will indeed learn it myself…

I am not so proud that I assume the wrongs I have committed have ever been less then those committed against me or that my wrongs where easier to forgive… I am not so naive as to think I will not be in need of forgiveness from others in the future.

I just find it hard… I just find it scary… I just keep on forgiving and pray for forgiveness my way. I just keep letting the tears come as I remember what my forgiveness cost my God… how he loves me in the depths of my unloveableness… when I am messy… when I am ugly…. He loves me, Jesus forgives me… AND I AM SO THANKFUL FOR FORGIVENESS!

He who cannot forgive breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass.
~George Herbert


TTFN

a THIS day (twelve)

by admin on March 8, 2011 in Bits Of My Personality, Do I Call It Parenting Advice?, Feeling It (Thankful), Four Little Eggs In My Nest with 3 Comments

I am a mother,

that is why I was finally able to get dressed up nicely and will still not be going anywhere this morning.

I am a mother,

that is why my two year old is yelling ‘I wanna booger’ and means I am to clean up his super sized sneeze.

I am a mother,

that is why my oldest child breaks down and picks a fight most mornings on her way to school, she knows she can trust me to still care.

I am a mother,

that is why my oldest son tries to lie to me and I see right through him and he can’t help but tell me and I punish him for the lie and hug him for the truth.

I am a mother,

that is why my husband took our only vehicle to work today, told me to have a relaxing day, while my four year old threw up in the kitchen.

I am a mother,

that is why I am so very thankful for the days when there isn’t a cold or flu in the house, thankful for the opportunities to get dressed up and make it out and thankful when I do have the family vehicle at my disposal.

I am a mother,

that is why I will find the opportunity to enjoy quiet time, slow time at home, catch up clean up time, read a book time today in between boogie rescues, flu bucket clean up and extra hand washing.

I am a mother.

I signed up for this and so much more… but today is about the ‘this’.

TTFN

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